It’s rough out there. Wars, atrocities, mass shootings, global warming, toxic polarization, free-floating anger and anxiety. We are often asked at MV Mediation about what we can do about world problems. Global conflicts and intractable societal problems weigh heavily on conflict resolvers’ minds just as they do for everyone. I thought that I’d offer approaches that have helped me, thinking they might help others during difficult times.
Look for the Helpers
Mister Rogers suggested for parents how to talk about tragedies and disheartening events with young children. “When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, ‘Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping . . . That will give you hope.’” It’s an appropriate reminder for adults, too. With some conscious effort, you can create a lens to look for those helpers, while not ignoring or trivializing the difficult reality.
Do Something
I’m not an international diplomat, environmental negotiator, or war zone mediator, so my hope is that my work closer to home can be useful for those I can help. Using the concept of circle of human concern from john a. powell I try to keep my focus on where I can make the most difference while not ignoring the larger planetary conflict. I remind myself that doing something is much better than the alternative, which is doing nothing.
Think Historically
The Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. popularized this notion: “The arc of the moraluniverse is long, but it bends toward justice.” The arc-of-history concept is a reminder that there’s so much more to come and that what we do today has an effect on the future. Young people are mobilized to make a difference. The Iroquois/Haudenosaunee Confederacy, along with other Indigenous groups, adhere to the Seventh Generation Principle—keeping in mind that our actions today have an effect all the way into the seventh generation of the future.
Face Your Fears
When fear rises up, I turn to the work of Audre Lorde. Her poetry, activism, and vision had huge ripple effects that still resonate today. She said this about fear: “When I dare to be powerful, to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid.” The idea is to look outside yourself and see if you can find ideas that tap into your power instead of your fearful self.
Learn Something
I find that learning something helps me to handle demoralization and sadness. The mantra says, “When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.’ I have always found that to be true for me. Look beyond the immediate moment to find something to learn and someone who can teach. Throughout my life I have returned to T. H. White’s quote from Merlyn: The Once and Future King: “The best thing for being sad . . . is to learn something. That is the only thing that never fails . . . That is the only thing which the mind can never exhaust . . . [l]earning is the thing for you.”
Serve Others
We try to support each other as we provide services to our clients, and it is great that many people want to become the helpers that Mister Rogers mentioned earlier. I don’t think is it solely magnanimity that drives people to serve others. We rise by lifting others. One of my friends has had a rough year, with illness, family loss, and various challenges. Yet on Thanksgiving she will be preparing dinners for those in need through a local restaurant. Being of service to another human can help to focus the gaze beyond an individual viewfinder and expand one’s vision. In the process, reframed within a wider context, concerns may seem to be a bit smaller, a bit more handleable. A smidge of optimism peeks through the gloomy skies with a bit of needed light.
Here is a longer version with more complete references. Read Musings here.